Meanwhile, in Texas...
Legislators consider overturning elections, Yellowstone Creator Sheridan Taylor channels his inner Matt Gaetz, and X-rated Bible-Thumping is poised to become part of public school curriculums.
Texas is as Texas does. Let’s begin with some silly legislation regarding the U.S. Constitution. Keep in mind that a great deal of legislation coming out of Texas legislative chambers often starts as a silly whim and becomes law, anyway.
The Texas Legislature will consider ousting Texas Senators who don’t pass a conservative litmus test
At least one state legislator in Texas, Brian Harrison (R-Midlothian), is scared to death that Texas’ two Republican U.S. senators, John Cornyn and Ted Cruz, won’t match the high Texas bar of conservatism necessary to justify their roles in the U.S. Senate on behalf of Texans. Even though Texans voted for them.
So he’s introduced a bill, House Bill 1267,1 that would remove either Senator if a simple majority in both chambers of the Texas Legislature vote say so. It’s essentially a recall vote, not through a plebiscite,2 but through a litmus test from a deep red legislature that recently gave America its first look at how a fascist theological state might persecute women seeking abortions.
If the recall is successful, the ousted Senator would have to leave office on the day of the election. According to Newsweek, Daniel Miller, president of the Texas Nationalist Movement, is all aflutter over the proposal.3 Does it stand a chance of passage? Would it survive a Supreme Court challenge? I dunno. Would America elect a deranged psycho as president?
One interesting thing about this is that, in the likelihood that Texans are faced with a crumbling economy if Republicans enact even a fraction of their economic agenda, such as broad-based tariffs, the legislators who approve this bill will be faced with a massive attack of face-eating leopards. Voters will insist that the legislature act to remove the scoundrels responsible for the mess, whether that mess is caused by an Oz-fueled pandemic or inflation spikes caused by tariffs, or one of a thousand other scenarios likely to emerge from a TVLand presidential administration filled with hucksters.
“Landman:” Taylor Sheridan Meets Matt Gaetz in the Permian Basin
I’ve generally enjoyed the writing of Taylor Sheridan, even though it’s hard to watch his epic television shows like Yellowstone without wondering if something dark lurks within the writer’s mind. With “Landman,” his newest series, the lurking dark force emerges with gusto when the main character, played by Billy Bob Thornton, is faced with a 17-year-old blond daughter so sexed up that you wonder if she’s going to rip off the leg of a barstool and do unmentionable things in front of dad. The women in the show are comic book caricatures of, I guess, how Sheridan imagines the women of Texas’ Permian Basin acting out in the midst of hysterical male chest-thumping that would make a baboon cover its eyes in shame.
Demi Moore makes occasional appearances as the wife of oil(y) company tycoon Monty Miller, played by Jon Hamm. In these daring scenes, she lounges in the swimming pool a lot and challenges Monty to get off his cell phone once in a while and play.
But it’s worse than all that. Thorton’s character, Tommy Norris, who is basically a fixer for an oil company in Midland, Texas, has the cringiest conversation about sex with his daughter this side of the Matt Gaetz cruise mob. For your added pleasure, his daughter is objectified in just about every scene. Watch as she jumps, scantily clad, to reach something in the closet while Norris’ elderly lawyer looks on trying to decide what level of inappropriateness is a suitable response. It’s a challenging plotline to deliver, and Sheridan pulls it off with expertise that can only be gleaned in one way that I can think of.
One alarmed TwitterX user said in response to a scene between daddy and daughter that someone should check Sheridan’s hard drive. This seems unlikely given the nominee for U.S. Attorney General. More likely is that these types of scenes will become standard fare as the nation’s testosterone levels heat up in the coming months. Yippee ki yay.
Bible Thumping is on the verge of becoming part of Texas school curriculums
If you’re a Texas parent, get ready for a lot of blood, gore, and misogyny to be added to your kids’ homework reading schedule.4 The state school board has voted 8-7 to add Bible classes to public school curriculums.
Soon, Texas kids will have the opportunity to read such lovely passages as Judges 19, which describes a gang rape of a concubine. Luckily, the original target of the story’s lustful fellows, who, like certain orange-colored demons in our modern world, were only trying to have a little fun, was spared. He was a man, which is probably why. Let’s have a look shall we?
As they were making their hearts merry, behold, the men of the city, worthless fellows, surrounded the house, beating on the door. And they said to the old man, the master of the house, “Bring out the man who came into your house, that we may know him.”5 And the man, the master of the house, went out to them and said to them, “No, my brothers, do not act so wickedly; since this man has come into my house, do not do this vile thing. Behold, here are my virgin daughter and his concubine. Let me bring them out now. Violate them and do with them what seems good to you, but against this man do not do this outrageous thing.” But the men would not listen to him. So the man seized his concubine and made her go out to them. And they knew her and abused her all night until the morning.
— Judges 19:22-25
Sounds like they’d fit well in Taylor Sheridan’s Permian Basin.
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Notes
“Texas HB1267 | 2025-2026 | 89th Legislature.” 2024. LegiScan. 2024. https://legiscan.com/TX/text/HB1267/2025#:~:text=Texas%20House%20Bill%201267%20(Prefiled%20Legislation)&text=Bill%20Title%3A%20Relating%20to%20the,States%20senator%20by%20the%20legislature..
California, for example, has famously staged recall votes against its governor. These are general elections that can result in a governor being recalled if a majority of Californians approve: “Laws Governing Recall in California.” 2014. Ballotpedia. 2014. https://ballotpedia.org/Laws_governing_recall_in_California.
Bickerton, James. 2024. “Texas Senators Could Be Recalled under New Proposal.” Newsweek. November 14, 2024. https://www.newsweek.com/texas-senators-could-recalled-under-new-proposal-1985737.
Sottile, Zoe. 2024. “Texas Officials Signal Support for Adding Bible Lessons for K-5 Classes as Some States Push Christianity in Public Schools.” CNN. November 19, 2024. https://www.cnn.com/2024/11/19/us/texas-bluebonnet-curriculum-bible-lessons/index.html.
“Know him” is bible speak for having sex with someone, in case you’re unfamiliar with Bible sexual parlance.
